Forgot the Carrots?

Look closely for the baby carrots, but mostly see the smiles

of mother, daughter, and grandmother

It was a joy to have a number of family members and some Japanese friends gather in January in Anderson. Somehow I reaped at least a little energy from our grandchildren, Little Ben and Hosanna, that has nourished me since. It was wonderful—except when Hosanna discovered her, “Give me!” voice. High-pitched, insistent, and in only one volume(LOUD), Hosanna’s voice sent me to our bedroom every afternoon for some respite. Also I had to get my ear plugs. It was the only way I could survive.

However one day, I forgot to remove the ear plugs before exiting the bedroom and joining everyone in the main room. Benjamin was the first to notice.

“Coco, why do you have carrots in your ears?” he asked before laughing uproariously at his joke. (He was comparing my ear plugs to the baby carrots with which we kept the refrigerator stocked as a snack food.)

After that, whenever he saw the plugs, he always laughed and asked, “Did you forget your carrots?”

Which is a question the Lord asked me the other day. Well, not exactly. But God did address me clearly—and surely with a smile on his face—“Did you forget me in the midst of everything going on? I’m as close to you as your ear plugs, and you don’t even seem to realize it.”

Yes, I believe that for too many days I’ve forgotten the carrots. They’re as close as “in my ears,” but still I’ve forgotten:

*All the people serving us as the Lord’s hand and feet through providing meals a couple of times a week;

*All those praying faithfully for us and believing in God’s miracles as together we walk this cancer journey;

*That God never changes, no matter what medical tests discover; and,

*That He is always worthy of my praise.

Open my eyes once again, Lord, that I may see you and experience you afresh in this day. Thank you for reminding me about the carrots.

The Battle Is Not Yours

Bernie returned to the U.S. from Japan on Christmas Day.

Both of us are in Indiana currently.

Words of encouragement, uplifting
“Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s . . . . You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you. . . . Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out and face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you” (2 Chronicles 20:15, 17, NIV).

Health updates
Celebrate!
1) The results of an MRI of the brain were clear. Renal cell carcinoma often metastasizes to the brain, so we were pleased with the results.
2) We finished 20 radiation treatments on February 8 and with minimal side effects, for which we thank God.
3) Apparently the radiation will continue effecting my body (positively, we hope) for the next up-to-six months. Please pray that these will happen: a stoppage in the growth of the tumor and/or the disappearance of the tumor. God is not finished with Cheryl’s renal cell carcinoma yet. Thank you for being a part of our prayer team to what God deliver us from fear, discouragement, and other significant challenges along the way.
4) Getting to spend time here in Anderson, Indiana, with family members is a bonus;
5) And, we’ve seen some obvious improvement in strength in my Cheryl’s balance, etc. But she’s still struggling with being able to speak and write logically and clearly, so every task accomplished is a time to celebrate.

Even more to celebrate
Let us be watch and see what the Lord is going to do!
1) “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea” (Psalm 46:1)
2) “The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing” (Zephaniah 3:17).

Yet more to celebrate—YOU!
Thank you for praying with us and walking the cancer journey with us to see the miracles God has in store for all of us.

The Stray Notebook

“Jesus is always with you, always Jesus is with you.”

The words were printed in a child’s script and encased within the skeletal body of a fish—a large, hand-drawn fish swimming across the page of notebook paper. Perhaps this was the whale that had swallowed Jonah in the Old Testament?

In any case, that was the scene I imagined when I read the words, “Always Jesus is with you.” And I added the thought: even if you happened to find yourself in the belly of a whale. What encouragement it must have been to a cold, wet, smelly, reprimanded Jonah who was intent on running away from God and his perfect plan for Jonah’s life. What an encouragement to me as well, waking up groggily after a night that was less than satisfactory: I was not alone. It was the message I most needed.

Who had left my cheery reminder to greet me that morning? To my surprise, as I looked through the orange notebook, I realized that what I’d found while looking for some scrap paper was more than 30 years old. Even more interesting, it had belonged to my sister-in-law. (It had been a university physics class notebook for her.) A little girl named Tabitha had found it in one of the apartments missionaries share when they are visiting their supporting churches across the United States, and it had become hers for doodling, drawing, and otherwise reminding herself of life’s important lessons. Tabitha didn’t quote the Bible word for word, but the message from the Lord was indeed the same: “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’ So we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid’” (Hebrews 12:5-6, NIV).

It is the message I need every day as I move through three-to-four weeks of daily radiation treatments (Monday to Friday) and continue traveling the cancer journey. I am being supported by the Lord as he works through a stray notebook, friends, family, and many people I don’t even know to bring me encouragement and the reminder that Jesus is always with me.

Obviously children can grasp and believe this vital message without difficulty. My prayer is that I, too, may have the innocent heart of a child to believe that God is walking with me and guiding me, and that he will never leave or abandon me, no matter where he leads. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The Battle Is Not Yours

Bernie and Cheryl (front row, far left)

and most of the rest of their family, January 2011:

more Bartons, Johnsons, and especially Little Ben and Hosanna Lyngdoh.

Words of encouragement, uplifting
“Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s . . . . You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you. . . . Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out and face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you” (2 Chronicles 20:15, 17, NIV).

Health updates
We apologize for the long silence between this newsletter and the last one (December 2010). Much has been happening in these couple of months, although we’ve not managed to keep you updated on the cancer journey that has occupied so much of our time, prayers, and energy. Among these:

►Bernie spent November and December in Japan, successfully completing many different assignments at Tamagawa Seigakuin and Tamagawa Church, both in Tokyo. Additionally, he had the joy of baptizing a new Christian sister, Mizutani-san, at Tarumi Church, in Kobe. He arrived back in the States on Christmas Day—a wonderful Christmas gift for Cheryl after their two months’ separation;

►Bernie and Cheryl celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary on January 10. Also, it was a joy to join Little Ben in celebrating his third birthday, January 30, since Donald and Stephanie Lyngdoh, our daughter and son-in-law, were granted some time off from their work to spend with Bernie and Cheryl in Anderson. What a blessing for us! We’re also grateful for other family visits, including Big Ben’s, for one week;

►We’ve completed 10 radiation sessions in Anderson to try to arrest the growth of the tumor. (Note that in November we made the somewhat difficult decision to stop medical care at M. D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, Texas, in order to seek further treatment here in Anderson where our mission offices are located and family is nearby). We continue to look to the Lord for his miraculous intervention in Cheryl’s physical body through radiation and other cancer treatments, some of which are experimental; and,

►We’re anticipating another round of CT scans and other tests at the end of January and early February. We are trusting God’s goodness and know that the path he chooses is always the right and loving one. Please pray with us that we will see miracles.

In the midst of sometimes feeling overwhelmed by the size of “this vast army” that faces us (cancer), there is so much for which to be grateful. Among other things, pain levels are being managed better and better and that is resulting in many more “good” days than otherwise. This is a major answer to prayer. However, the road ahead is still long and the battle still arduous. Please pray for us to remember that the battle is not ours, but the Lord’s. Pray that we will be able to keep our eyes upon the Lord as we journey.

Looking ahead on the journey
Here are some specific ways you can pray with and for us on the journey:

►Bernie and Cheryl had expected to return to Japan by the end of January, but this has been postponed, creating some challenges for Tamagawa Seigakuin and Tamagawa Church, not to mention our associate pastor, Fujiwara-sensei. Please pray for all of these to be resolved in a timely fashion that will cause the least amount of disruption and concern;

►Cheryl continues working on two books: Our Hearts Burning, the 15th international testimonies book she has compiled and edited; and Steady Till Sunset, a daily devotional book, the second one she has written to encourage Christians to walk faithfully in their daily lives. Please pray that God will supply the physical needs (especially a clear head in order to think and write) so she can complete these two projects;

►With health questions still “up in the air,” there is so much still that seems to be on hold. Please do pray for us to know the Lord’s guidance as we make decisions about our future.

►Please pray for us to be able to return to Japan as quickly as possible.

Merry Christmas

Several years ago, while on a writing assignment in Chiang Mai, Thailand, I visited an international church during the Advent season. Although the graceful palm trees, deep pink bougainvilleas, and warm, if not hot, temperatures challenged my expectations of the backdrop necessary for Christmas, the story I heard that day was the very essence of the true meaning of Christmas. It was shared by a guest preacher, a missionary working among Thailand’s tribal peoples.

Shortly beforehand, the missionary had traveled to a remote district to visit contacts that had been made in earlier trips there. This time, his young son—perhaps three or four years old—had accompanied him. Unfortunately, the boy had tripped and fallen as he walked alongside his father, and the resulting cut on his face was deep and required stitches. Although the missionary quickly located a primitive medical clinic, no anesthesia was available there—only the suturing materials. Despite the awful pain he knew would be inflicted on his son, the father agreed to the procedure anyway. Without it, the lad could risk serious infection and be disfigured for life.

“Daddy! Daddy!” the little boy shrieked in pain and terror as the clinician somehow managed to stitch the wound as his father pressed his muscular torso across the boy’s body to keep him still on the examining table. “Stop! Why are you doing this to me?”

How could the father possibly explain to him so he could understand that it was out of his love for his firstborn that he was allowing the pain—even participating in it? He couldn’t. Instead, his sobs shook his bulky frame and his tears wet the boy’s soft skin beneath him.

“Oh, my son, my son,” the missionary exhaled a word with each sob.

“If you only knew how much I love you. If you could only understand that I am holding you now in love, even allowing this pain because I love you. You simply can’t understand, my beloved boy. But know this: I’ll not leave you alone in your pain,” he repeated again and again in his heart.

Even the sound of his father’s voice, intended to soothe, only seemed to antagonize the boy—when he could hear it over his wailing. “If you love me, if you care, why don’t you stop?” the screams seemed to accuse. “You could stop this all in an instant.”

So the father, out of boundless, matchless, incomprehensible, even unrequited love, silently enveloped the writhing, agonizing body of his toddler until the horrific time finally passed. It was a big chance he took on the outcome—not whether the outward scar would heal, but whether the far more painful, costly, and dangerous scars to the heart would ever mend. He couldn’t help but wonder; still his faith was even stronger than this doubt that the boy would emerge knowing, without question, the truth of the father’s never-ending love for him. And on this unshakable truth, the boy would live out all the days of his life as God had ordained each one of them to be.

“The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him ‘Immanuel’—which means ‘God with us’ (Matthew 1:23, NIV).

May you know the powerful message of Christmas this year: In love, God with us—always, forever, no matter what.